Inside/maybe outside Jokes, favorite quotes =D

Okay, so I absolutely ADORE inside jokes (unless i'm on the outside) cuz they never cease to thrust me into hysterics everytime I read them. I have notebooks and notebooks filled up with stupid little phrases that the average intellectual couldnt understand if they tried. Well most of them may be stupid enough for that. Anyways I have sooo many, and I usually post them on my facebook, http://www.facebook.com/note.php?saved&&suggest&note_id=57939064535#/profile.php?id=1018597566&v=info&viewas=1018597566
but it won't hold them all. :( So I'm gonna share some here! :) LUCKY YOU :D

"Would an albino polar bear be black?"-Adam Lebanoff
"You d*** morphodite! I'll kill you!"-Scout Finch
"Taylor Lautner is MY brand of heroin!"-Me
"OMG! Corn pops is pop corn backwards!"-Me
"Look, Mary, you may live in the 90210, but ur still just a zero! Um, Bree, we live in the 90211..."- Mary and Bree (Another Cinderella Story)
"Look, Kendall, you may live in the 904, but ur still just a mor....ON! lolol-Me
"OH! but yes you are funny sometimes.."-Kendall Klusmeier (HA!)
"If u were stranded on a desert island, would you eat glue sticks?"-Rachel Wachs
"Ur mom goes to mitochondria school!"-Adam Lebanoff
"Whats up with Now and Laters, anyway? Are u supposed to chew them, or suck them?"-Alex Hochwald
"Mr.Dean: What causes the illusion of faces on the moon, class?Rachel: Um drugs..?"-Mr.Dean and Rachel Wachs
"In other words, its milkshake would bring all the boys to the yard"-Mr.Dean
"If the tongue is the strongest muscle in the body, how come it hurts so much when you try to lift weights with it?"-Me
"They aren't horny books, Adam. They're just... elaborate pageturners."-Me
"Valentines Day is CANCELLED! Apparently, u told Cupid u were sexy... he died laughing. Thanks a lot!-Kenya Johnson
"Donnie, relax. I mean, this morning, I thought I saw a cheeseburger doing yoga."-Louis Stevens
"Gurl, I will CUT you."-Bon Qui Qui
"Article: "He's shy about the spotlight. She bathes in it"Vaughn: Thats just because he doesnt bathe."- Article on the internet comparing Rob Pattinson to Paris Hilton, and Vaughn
"You had a transvestite barbie??!"-Mom
"Your just jealous that ur not as "with it" as I am!"-Mom
"Jimmy, finish your crust."-lady from Bill Nye,... and Vaughn
"Will somebody PLEEZ explain to me how that looks like a turtle?!?!"-Me (about the retarded"awkward turtle" thing)
"..trip the light fantastic..." -Mr. Price
"My stupid bladder ruins everything!"-Me
"Stupid asteroids ruin everything!"-Me
"Holocaust. What is that, a church or somethin?" -sum idiot
"Thats not his finger..." -Jonathan Grant
"But she doesn't have a...!" Alex Hochwald

Things I luv :)

*ice cream *corny jokes *my ipod *funny jokes *texting *old cartoons *watching movies *good news *musicals *blogging *SCHOOL *blowing bubbles *twilight fandom *reading eclipse *facebooking *youtube *shiny convertibles *presents *my frieends :) *inside jokes *vacations *giraffes *texting (i like it twice, tee hee) *laughing 4 no reason at innapropriate times *british accents *laughing WITH(not at) hochwald *comedy central *pretending im fluent in french, and british.. *putting smilys at the ends of sentences *starbucks *writing "TEAM JACOB" and "Je T'aime" and "Deenee" on desks *hugs *and more.. but ill add them later :)

The Small Assassin

It doesn't make much sense for baby to kill their parents, does it? Well, it doesn't make too much sense to me. But in The Small Assassin, a new born baby killed his parents. If it were accidental, I still don't know. Many mothers have perished in childbirth, similar to the fact that the mother in The Small Assassin almost died when she was birthing the baby. This drew the mother to believe that the baby tried to kill her, so she hated the baby. At first I thought the mother was just paranoid. But was she? Could a baby really plan something like that? Maybe, because later in the story the father is almost killed by tripping and falling down the stairs. He tripped on a toy that the baby placed at the top of the stairs. The next day it was there again. Only this time it was the mother who tripped, and she died. This causes the man to hate the baby like the mother did, so he named it Lucifer. Then, some toxic gases are left running in the house, which kills the father.

It is not very clear to me why a baby would want to kill their parents but lets go back to our question, 'Could a baby really plan something like that?'. After reading this story, I think its possible.

All Summer in a Day

How would you feel if you and your family moved to Venus, where it rains all day. You would rarely get to see the sun.Well in All Summer in a Day, that is what happened to a girl named Margot. Her classmates hated her because she has had the opportunity to experience full days of sun, while they lived on Venus all their lives.
This might sound strange, but what if this story were set in the past, rather than the future. I learned that Venus probably once had large amounts of water on it, like Earth, but it all boiled away. I also learned that Venus has somewhat of a green house effect, which may have contributed to the fact that it got so hot. So maybe this story is coming from the idea that Venus may have been inhabitable before the greenhouse effect caused the temperature to rise. In this case, it would be set in the past.

The Gift

Another Ray Bradbury short story, The Gift, is set far in the future, when families can take casual space shuttle trips to Mars. In the beginning of The Gift, a father, mother and their small son board a space shuttle on the boy's first trip to Mars. NASA has sent exploration vehicles to the red planet to determine if Mars is, or will ever be, inhabitable. So it is very possible that trips like the one in The Gift will be available in the future.

I think the researching of Mars' ability to support life will prove very beneficial to the future of the human race when global warming takes its toll on Earth and the generations living on Earth will need a planet to evacuate to.

The Veldt

Have you ever thought about investing in a "smart house"? You know, those automated houses that do everything from tying your shoes to taking your shower. Well In Ray Bradbury's The Veldt, it is relevant that having a smart house can, in some ways drive you crazy. This story involves a room in which your thoughts are projected on the walls. The two children, that thrive in the room, are so taken care of by the house that they begin to lack in need for their parents. When parents sense something strange about the children, they decide to shut the entire house down. This causes the children to become angry and kill their parents by locking them in the room with a live, hungry lion. The story reminds me of an old Disney Channel film, Smart House, in which a family's "smart house" program malfunctions and produces a holographic, overprotective, chaotic mother, who tremendously corrupts the family's household. I noticed something about this movie. In one of the kids' rooms, there are walls that play music and show concerts. An African veldt can be seen on this wall later, a probable adaptation of Ray Bradbury's The Veldt.

Now, doesn't that make you think...